That might be one of the most nerve-racking moments in your life. The Preacher finally pronounces you husband and wife. Now while you know your new wife’s lips from end to end, suddenly the pressure is on. After all, your Mom & Dad are watching, the Pastor and all your friends. Usually you kiss in private and now you have to stick your tongue in her mouth and woo her as you supposedly share your first kiss. It is quite a show to behold!
So this is another wedding post because I just love weddings…especially coloured weddings! I attended one this weekend. It was great. Many congratulations on your special day, Randall & Lydia! We had so much fun! We wish you loads of happy years together!
I hate differentiating between the races, but there is just something special about coloured weddings. As usual you meet up with people you haven’t seen in some time. It feels like a reunion and everybody is happy and expectant…looking forward to a “lekker” reception and a free meal!
Usually the Master of Ceremonies is a funny guy. He could be a friend or family member. He’ll crack up everyone with advice and jokes about marriage. He might be daring and might even dish out the dirt on either one of you too! So be prepared!
One thing is for sure, there is always a joker around. He stirs up the crowd and gets everyone laughing. He might also get on some people’s nerves. Then there is always a girl (or a few) that likes drawing attention. She will be wearing a daring outfit and all the men will be checking her out. Also, be warned! There is always an Aunty trying to “take” something home. If you’re not careful, she’ll take home the vase you hired or even a glass. She will definitely use a serviette and pack some food in her bag for the kids at home!
When the DJ opens with the first song everyone will be rushing to the floor. Hopefully he plays some classics that get the crowd going. Classics include a track from the Jimmy Hendricks band, definitely a Grease song and Brenda Fassie’s “Weekend Special”. You can bet yourself that there will be a middle-aged guy, who will pull out some dance moves that we haven’t seen ever. It is evident that he might suffer from a mid-life crisis. He will be trying to dance with that girl with the short dress and she will happily oblige!
Aaaah…you gotta love weddings. It did however get me thinking about the general etiquette that goes along with the order of a wedding.
1. Firstly let’s talk about dress code: Depending on what the bride and groom indicated the wedding invitation, it is usually a formal affair. Ladies can wear smart cocktail dresses and gents usually a jacket and smart pants. However ladies, please do not wear a white dress or a veil! Try not to steal the show as it is the Bride’s day.
The Mother of the Bride usually has first option for choosing the style and colour of her outfit after the Bridal party has chosen theirs.
2. Seating at the ceremony: The bride’s family sits on the left side of the aisle while the groom’s family sits on the right. The mothers always have the best seats…usually in the front row with the fathers beside them. The Bridal party joins them in the front row.
- The Processional: When the bride is ready, the appropriate wedding music starts and the procession begin with the youngest attendant. Flower girls, ring bearers and young bridesmaids enter first. They can walk in pairs or alone, although it is often best to have the smaller attendants in pairs, closely followed by a bridesmaid. Older bridesmaids and maids of honour (married bridesmaids) follow. The bride enters with her father (or close male relative) as her escort.
- The Recessional: At the end of the ceremony, the celebrant will pronounce the bride and groom married and might introduce them as husband and wife. At this stage the ceremony is over. Before they leave they have to sign the wedding register. After this they are ready to leave the church. The couple walks back down the aisle first. Then the flower girl and ring bearer and then the bridesmaids and best man. The parents of the bride should leave next, followed by the parents of the groom. The remaining guests leave row by row. If there is an usher, this can be organized from the front row to the back.
Here are a few general tips:
- Turn your cell phone off in the church.
- Make sure you don’t run out of food or drink!
- Don’t walk off with the flower arrangements on the tables unless you’ve been given permission to do so (especially if you leave early).
- Stay sober for the formal bits – like speeches and photographs (and the wedding ceremony).
- Don’t seat divorced parents who hate each other side by side.
- It is poor wedding etiquette if the groom is not standing at the bottom of the aisle when the bride arrives.
- Do not interrupt the preacher/minister whilst busy with the wedding ceremony.
That was a mouthful. A wedding is also the joining of two very different families. Keep in mind that each of you grew up with different traditions so learn to accommodate each other. Above all…enjoy the day, a wedding is a celebration!
PS: Apologies for skipping a post yesterday. I had endless problems connecting to the Internet.